Your apologies are meaningless along with your promises…

You hurt me

“I’m sorry it won’t happen again”

and I fell for it

but the next time around

you say it again

“I’m sorry it won’t happen again”

“I promise”

Do you realize what you said?

Do you realize how you said it?

“I’m sorry it won’t happen again”

Why are we running in circles?

Why do you treat people like this?

Don’t tell me what you think I want to hear.

Don’t tell me you’re sorry.

Don’t make promises

Don’t say anything

Because your apologies are meaningless

along with your promises…

~Colorful Daydreamer

Beautiful Like You

“And I wish that you could feel it. But you don’t choose to believe it cause I know that you can’t see it that way.”~Beautiful Like You by Lee DeWyze

More often times than not when I call someone beautiful they disagree and then point out all their flaws or things that they don’t like about themselves.

I never said that you’re flawless or that you don’t have insecurities.  I said you were beautiful.  When I tell you that you are beautiful I hope you know that I admire you not only for the things that I think are absolutely perfect about you but I also say it because I know about your flaws.  I have flaws too…Believe me.    

I wish you could look into the mirror and see all the great things that I see when I look at you.  Even if it’s for a few seconds.  I wish that you could believe me when I say “You’re beautiful”.  I really do think so.  I wish I could convince you.  But I know I’ll probably never be able to.  I wish I could show you how amazing you are to me because I know the mirror whispers awful things into your ears.

Stop negatively categorizing yourself or putting a label on what you see because I what I see is you and you are beautiful.

So if I could scream all of this to you I would.  But I can’t so here I am telling the world that I think you are beautiful and leaving them to ask the question “who is this about?”  It’s about you……..

~Colorful Daydreamer

 

Lame

When you want to write

but your mind stays as blank as the paper

When you want to draw

but it ends up being scribbles

When you want to do something

but nothing seems entertaining

When you want to listen to music

but end up skipping every single song

when you’re hungry

but nothing looks appetizing

When you want to hang out or talk to people

but everyone is busy


This is me today.  I have to make a cake soon because it’s thanksgiving tomorrow.  But that’s all the plans I have for today.  I’m just having a lame day.  Which a lazy day is good once in a while but I would much rather be out doing something.

Appreciated

“Cause it’s you, who, takes care of everyone else. You, need to allow me to help, you Ohh, appreciated-Cause it’s you who somehow is always the first, to, take care of me at my worst. You are appreciated”~Appreciated by Rixton

I know to think that you  aren’t.  I know you think that people don’t care about you.  But people do…do.  I can’t even express it.  I hope you know that you are much more than a face in the crowd or an acquaintance.  You are someone who I’ve been lucky enough to get to know.

I know that people always go to you for help.  And you always help because you care.  You can always see when other people are upset.  You always lend your hand even if both of them are tied.  And yet when your smile is a shield and, your laugh is a scream people don’t notice.  But I’ll be here. As long as you want.

I know that I’m an awkward person that never knows what to say.  But I want you to know that there is so much you do for people.

Thank you.  Who knows where we’d be if we didn’t know of each other’s existence.  I can’t believe how understanding you are.  When I do something stupid you laugh.  When I say something crazy you respond as if it’s totally normal.

I know that I’m crazy cheesy.  But I hope the words you read from me help with the pain of your hardest days.  I know how difficult it is to ask for help from someone or to talk to somebody.  But you are never a bother.  I always want to talk and I don’t care what it is we talk about.

I know how much you wish you could catch everybody as they fall.  I know that you stretch yourself so far.

I hope you know how much you are worth.  Even if it’s just for a few little moments.

~Colorful Daydreamer

Life is Beautiful

“A father’s love, A wedding dance, New Year’s dreams, A toast with friends, A soldier coming home from war, The faith the hope of so much more, A brand new life, a mother’s prayer, Shooting stars, ocean air, A lover’s kiss, and hard goodbyes, Fireworks, Christmas lights-These are things that make us feel alive.” ~Life is Beautiful by The Afters

Well, it’s that time of year again.  Time to give thanks and be grateful.

I think that being grateful is so important.  I think looking at life as a whole is an important thing.  I believe that people should take the time and remind themselves that they have something to look forward to.  Whether it’s something that is happening the next day or the next year.

Feeling alive starts with gratitude.  Whether it is something in the quote or not. We all have something that makes us think “I’m alive.”

I grew up in a small house on a lake in the middle of the woods.  Ever since I was really little I have loved nature.  I’ve always felt so much happier outside.  I’ve always loved the way the leaves sound and how the air smells as the seasons change.

To look at your life and tell yourself that there is nothing to live for is something a lot of people do (including myself).   I constantly remind myself what I’ll never get to experience if I were to take my life.  I do think a lot about what I have been so lucky to experience in my lifetime.

I think we all need to take moments to be outside of the moment or our person.  I think that we need to think about what is going on around us.  And to appreciate things that are close to us.

Be grateful today and every day.  EXPRESS YOUR GRATITUDE!  I can not stress that enough.  Because when you tell someone that you are grateful for them it will make both of your days so much better.

Take this time to think about what you’re grateful for.

~Colorful Daydreamer

Quote response?(Somebody Else)

I’m responding to the song “Somebody Else” by The 1975 as a quote today.

I think this song is so great.  Definitely one of my newest songs I play on repeat ALL THE TIME! This song is one of many on a private playlist I made.

I think that everyone can relate to this song.  Especially if somebody broke up with you for someone else.  Because you don’t want them back but it hurts so badly to see them with that person.  Even if you don’t have the same feelings for that person that you once did.

I’ve been dealing with a ton of anxiety over the past few weeks because of my most recent breakup.  Mostly because of how much I regret.  But most of all because I’m supposed to be happy.  Because we both have somebody else.  And she is happy.

I am happy.  There are so many things that are going on in my life that I’m thankful and excited for.

I have a boyfriend now.  He is so sweet.  He holds me closer than I’ve ever been. He tells me the cheesiest things. (And that’s coming from me!)  His hand in mine is the only thing that holds me together some days.  His eyes are the most beautiful blue I’ve ever seen.

But what if this is just psychological projection.  What if I don’t actually feel what I feel for him.   It feels so real.  But there’s that voice in my head saying “but what if it’s not?”  I really care about him and I don’t know what I’d do without him at this point.

As I write this my hands become shaky, my heart begins to race, there is a rock sitting in my throat, I can feel the goosebumps on my arms and my stomach is turning.  She will see this soon they both will.  All the people I don’t want to see this will see this but they all deserve the truth.  And I know I will be more than embarrassed.  Because what I felt for her was real.  And what she felt for me just…was not.

I’m afraid of what they will think.  Will they talk about it?  What will they say?  Will they laugh?  I don’t really want to know.

I just don’t know how to feel at this point.  I probably will avoid people all day.  Except for my best friend.  Because I’m not afraid of saying the wrong thing to her.  Because she is the best and respects what I think even when she probably shouldn’t.

~Colorful Daydreamer